Women's Dictionary
• Yes = No
• No = Yes
• Maybe = No
• I’m sorry = You’ll be sorry
• We need = I want
• It’s your decision = My correct decision should be obvious by now
• Do what you want = You’ll pay for this later
• We need to talk = I need to complain
• Sure go ahead = I don’t want you to
• I’m not upset = Of course I’m upset, you moron
• This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house
• I want new curtains = carpeting, furniture, and wallpaper
• I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep
• Do you love me? = I was going to ask for something expensive
• How much do you love me? = I did something today you’re going to hate
• I’ll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV
• You have to learn communication = Just agree with me